15 month update

I'm late with this blog entry again!  I was actually thinking about stopping these updates altogether, but then I felt guilty about not documenting Josiah's milestones.  Plus, this is also cathartic for me, so I'll see how long I can keep this up!  Things have just been so busy with the work-life juggle, particularly as both have just seemed to get more involved at the same time.  It's true what they say - keeping up with a toddler is so much more stressful than a baby!  Makes me shudder at what's ahead for the future (semi-kidding).  If any indication of my harried state, I finally had a moment today to go through unread emails and unpaid (and late) bills.  This is so unlike me, but the one upside to this is perhaps my OCD tendencies are loosening up?  Or maybe that's just me trying to feel better =P

Anyway, onto Josiah's milestones.  One of the biggest turn of events was that Josiah became suddenly clingy to ME!  For 14 months, Josiah clearly preferred his daddy...now all of a sudden, he whines, runs toward and sticks to me.  While somewhat vindicating (after all, who gave birth to you?), it's actually a bit exhausting because it means having to attend to his whine/tantrum outbursts.  Those have been happening more often lately, which is not fun, and has made bedtime particularly difficult.  We were just on a good roll with his sleep routine, but as all parents have told us, nothing good (or bad) is forever!

I hope these screaming episodes will go away once he starts picking up more words to express himself.  For example, one time we discovered his screaming rant was all due to thirst.  If only he would say "water", and voila, we'd give him his sippy cup!  His vocabulary right now is still pretty limited - "bye bye", "ro?" (hello, when picking up a phone) "dat" (that?), "bobby" (baby), and "ear".  Nope, no "mommy" or "daddy" yet, although we will hear hints of it sometimes if we're lucky.  But most of all, his main mode of communication is still high-pitched screaming, especially when we take things away from him.  As the doctor told us at birth, the dude's got lungs.

Another big milestone was that he started walking!  He's still so cautious, so I couldn't imagine it ever happening.  But just last week, he took about 10 wobbly, but definite steps.  He looks visibly disturbed when he falls, so I think that's what is holding him back. But he's getting a bit more confident everyday.  Like everyone warned me, it's not always a good thing.  He's harder to contain (I hope that's not an inhumane word) and already getting his grubby hands into more things he shouldn't, which is forcing us to renovate (aka get rid of stuff or place things higher) more often.  Ugh, what's life going to be like when he's running???

He still loves music and reading.  He shakes his head and booty to his music and loves listening to the songs we sing.  He's really into "Old McDonald" and even says "EIEIE" and barks and moos with us.  He's learning "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes" but is still confused with his body parts.   He loves all his books but is really into "Goodnight Moon", "That's Not my Elephant", "Welcome to the Zoo" and "Trucks".  It's cute now that he selects the book for us to read.

One personality trait that we've observed is that he's very social and likes to chat with anyone, in his minion-like gibberish.  The funniest thing is that all of our neighbors seem to know him.  During the weekend, we often bump into several parents and kids who are like "Hi Josiah!!" and he rambles something back.  Apparently he has lots of girlfriends in the building (Ella, Anastasia, Leah, etc.) too!  Mommy is not ready for that yet!




  

14 month update

Rocking out with his doggie guitar

Our little man is 14 months old now!  We had a lot of family time (read: exhausting & hands-full time) this month with a weekend trip to Lake Placid (with my parents) for Laura & Charlie's wedding, and a trip out to Washington State for Carolyn & Ken's wedding.  Both were great trips, not necessarily relaxing "vacations" in the least.  Despite how tiring they were, it was totally worth it to travel and experience new things as a family. Even though Josiah will soon forget these trips, it was fun to see him take in all the new sights and meet some of our good friends who live afar.

In front of the Space Needle in Seattle

With Ken & Carolyn Weeks

Mirror Lake in Lake Placid

Other than vacations, we've had some other fun moments with Josiah.

• Still not walking, but crawling at warp speed!  When we come home from work or show him something he wants (like his bottle), he starts panting and speeding toward us on all fours.
• Enjoys his whole milk (still heated), but not yet in a sippy cup.  He'll only take water in a straw cup.  He also loves eating what we eat (like nuggets and fries) but freaks and spits when we try to give him anything that looks like baby food. 
• Loves to roll around on the bed and do somersaults.  He's like a football - you never know which direction he's going to go.  
• Is curious about belly buttons and says "taka taka" (tickle) when he wants to goof around.
• Seems to be pretty organized and systematic.  He loves to go to his pile of books to look through them and put them in another cubbie.  I'm pretty sure he thinks he's cleaning, but I wish he would just leave them in their original place (says the OCD mom). 
• Likes to jam to music. He'll press one of his musical toys and start gyrating with a very serious look on his face.
• Loves the remote control, especially because he knows he's not supposed to touch it.  He even points it to the TV and presses buttons and crawls away from us afterwards.
• Has big feet!  We finally got him some proper shoes and were told that we've been shoving shoes two sizes too small on him.  He wears a 6 WIDE.  I'm sad that he'll be limited in terms of cool shoes down the road...
• Still chatting up a storm (sounds like a minion) and flirting with anyone who comes along his path. Maybe it's because of our social nanny, but everyone on our block seems to know him!
• Likes the song, "Wheels on the Bus" a lot.  He likes the "swish" and "beep" parts and sings "Ohhh" during the "all through the town" part.  So cute and pretty in tune!

13 month update

I'm writing this post almost a week late...just goes to show what a crazy, eventful time this has been.  This month has been marked by dramatic highs and lows.  We kicked off this month with Josiah's 1st birthday party, which was wonderful despite my stressing out and last-minute crafting efforts (thankfully with my sister by my side).  It all came together in the end...but the sweetest part was seeing how happy Josiah was during the entire party.  He must be an extrovert because he was smiling and laughing the entire time, gleefully being passed around from person to person.  Not one tear, not a single shriek.  And given how "spirited" he's been these days, that was nothing short of a miracle!  All in all, we had a great time surrounded by family and friends who helped us get through the past 12 months of joys and trials that came with being new parents.

In contrast to that joyous occasion, we suffered a big loss at the end of July with Shaggy's father passing away from a stroke. This same community of family and friends has been critical in getting us through this difficult time and we are so thankful for everyone's generosity and support.  Even family members, like our cousins from California, came from afar to mourn together, as well as celebrate the amazing life that he led.  Although my father-in-law had been frail for awhile, we had been seeing progress and were hopeful that he would continue getting better.  This was, and continues to be, hard to accept that he is no longer here with us.  We know that he is with God in heaven and that he is no longer suffering...but that doesn't mean that we don't miss him.  I regret that Josiah won't get to know him well, but I am also left with the sweet memory of how happy his Grandpa was at his birthday party and his constant declaration that "he is going to be a great man"!  Please continue to pray for the family, as I imagine the sadness really never goes away.

As we do our best to move on, we are reminded of the fragility of life and how each person in our life is a gift.  And as I look at my beautiful son, I have to be thankful for each day we have together....even when he throws screaming fits and food at me!  I believe I am just getting a glimpse into what terrible-two tantrums will be like...and I am so not prepared.  Luckily these new developments, both good and bad, come in stages.  I am convinced that God knows what we can handle and gives us what we need to overcome.

Here are some other random highlights from this month:

• J is losing his rolls, slowly bur surely.  At his one-year doc appointment, we saw his weight had not changed since his 9 month appointment!  
• He has not yet taken his first steps.  While he loves crawling and cruising around, he's still extremely cautious and nervous about taking the plunge.  When we try to lure him over, he gingerly gets on his knees before making a move.
• We are now on whole milk.  While I was ready to celebrate the end of mixing formula bottles, I found that Josiah will only drink the whole milk when heated.  Sigh, one step forward, two steps back.  The next transition is the sippy cup, but we are trying to pace ourselves.  He's gradually getting better at it, but gets really frustrated and throws it on the floor.  He still does not hold his own bottle...I think he is getting used to us doing all the work for him.
• We are officially off purees and onto table food.  This makes food planning more difficult.  He loves eating whatever we are eating, especially carbs.  I am trying to teach him how to sign when he is no longer hungry, but to no avail.  Instead, he spits everything out of his mouth when he's done.
• He is quite the talker.  He's picking up more sounds and babbles away in all kinds of intonations.  We love waking up to the sound of him talking to himself.  He laughs and imitates funny sounds like "ahchoo", "vroom" and "brrr".  He still refuses to say "umma" and "appa" though :(
• He's got tricks!  He claps, waves "buh-bye", gives high-fives, picks up the phone (and all kinds of objects to say "herrro", and sometimes blows kisses.  He occasionally will lean in for me to kiss him too.  I am waiting (patiently) for the day that he actually wants to hug or kiss ME!
• He is very playful.  He tries to do somersaults in his crib, bounces balls (and loves throwing them out of his playpen), gets really into his puzzles and books, gets mesmerized by nursery rhymes ("wheels on the bus" is his fave), and cruises around in his new buggie.  Apparently he is a social butterfly as everyone on our block seems to know him!
• He hates being restrained and started resisting his changing pad, high chair, and stroller.  Like anything else, I am starting to get immune to his screams and kicks.  Luckily, he stops screaming and quickly as he starts it, with the help of something distracting...like the iphone :)
• While he first hated it, he now loves brushing his teeth.  He stares at it when we put it in his mouth, grips down on the brush and slurps the gel. 
• He's getting more and more coordinated, particularly his feet.  From birth he seemed to have an affinity toward using his feet over his hands.  Even now, he's constantly kicking, pushing, or grabbing things with his feet - our little monkey man!

The next few weeks are going to be busy.  We are heading up to Lake Placid for a wedding, followed by Spokane/Seattle for a wedding and vacation.  We are praying that the car and plane rides will be uneventful and that the trips won't be too stressful.  I'm looking forward to some R&R time before the summer is over!

ONE Year!

One year ago, I gave birth to this little, sleepy baby boy...

Fast forward to now, I have a bonafide toddler on my hands!

These past 12 months have been quite a journey marked by constant transitions...some dark periods, and many light and joyful ones too.  Most of all, it's been a life-changing experience being a mother, yet I know I have only grazed the surface of what that even means.  What I do know is that it is a privilege to be Josiah's mom, even though it certainly isn't always easy. 

Let's just say that Josiah has become one active and sassy kid.  It's so hard to get his attention these days, even though we shout his name and make all kinds of noises.  The only thing that seems to work right now are when I make monkey noises - yup, losing my dignity slowly but surely.  He needs to touch (aka mess up) everything in sight, and shrieks when we take things away from him.  He's pretty rough, particularly with me, and will slap and kick often.  He still gets fixated by our faces, especially mouths, and will poke, prod, and scratch...hard! We speak sternly to him and are trying to reinforce "gentle", which sometimes gets him really upset and pouty.  We try to hold our ground, but it's the funniest thing to watch him transform into a "prune-face".

His increasing independence has made bedtime a real challenge these days. He flails his body when we lower him into the crib and immediately bursts into tears.  Watching him standing in his crib, tossing his dolls and pacifiers out of the crib and desperately crying out for us is so heart-breaking.  Or sometimes, he changes his strategy and starts tossing his loveys and pacis out of the crib.  One way or another, one of us usually caves and of course, our little con artist immediately starts smiling once we re-enter the room!  It's clear who is in charge here.  Thankfully, once he's down, he still sleeps a good stretch and we find ourselves waking up to his rowdy babbles and laughs the next morning.

Josiah's grins and laughs are the cutest.  These days, whenever Josiah hears us heartily laughing, he joins in.  He is still generally shy and stoic when he first sees people, but quickly gets into his giggly, flirty self once warmed up.  Then he starts with his tricks - waving "bye bye", clapping "yay", and giving high-fives.  While we are thrilled to see this progress, he isn't very keen on learning any other signs.  I keep trying to teach him "more" and "milk", but he'll just slap my hand away or give me a stare like I'm crazy.  Actually, he tends to give me that look of annoyance a lot...seriously, sometimes I think we have a Lois-Stewie thing going on :(

So many little idiosyncracies to note, but not enough time to mention them all.  Through these past 12 months of motherhood "boot camp", I've tried to record as many observations and emotions throughout to track how much he's grown...and more profoundly, how we've grown!  Shaggy and I often say to each other, "Can you believe we have a kid?".  We are reminded daily of how we fall short as people and as parents, yet how God's grace gives us strength and joy to sustain us.  And He will just keep stretching us!  As hard as this year has been, I am sure I'll be looking back in a few years thinking how easy things were...for now, I'll just keep taking things one (baby) step at a time and enjoy the process.

11 month update

Goofing around

Happy 11 months to Josiah, and 33 years to me!  This was my first birthday as a mom, which was such a different feeling.  Instead of being all about my birthday and the festivities, the day just snuck up on me this year.  Even still, it was a great time to spend with family and friends and take a moment to be thankful.  Of course, the greatest blessing this year has been Josiah.  Although not all fun and games, it's been an amazing ride...with much more to come.  He's literally growing before our eyes!  He's gotten so tall recently, as evident in the holes in his PJs and the stretching out of his precious rolls.

Josiah stands and cruises confidently and tries to let go and take more physical risks these days (sometimes resulting in a fall).  He babbles and shrieks a lot and likes to imitate some of our sounds, especially "ahchoo" and "uh oh".  I hope those don't count as first words!  He's so giggly and responsive these days, easily tickled by our funny sounds, games, and gestures.  He also learned to shake his head and does it all the time with a big grin on his face.  He also enjoys tossing his lovey blankets and pacis over the edge of the crib.  He's still fascinated with our faces, particularly our mouths.  While it was initially cute a few months ago, now I have to constantly dodge his fingers from scratching my teeth and lips.

Caught red handed

Josiah's generally happy, but he's also more indignant about things he doesn't like.  He screams when we put him down in his crib and resists from being put in the stroller or on the changing table.  While he's taking the bottle so much better these days, he's starting to refuse pureed foods and just stares at our food.  He hits the spoon out of our hands and rips off his bib in protest.  He loves any of our table food that we offer him (except for strawberries).  Even when he freaks out, the cutest thing is when he pops a pacifier in his mouth by himself.  His pacifier is attached to him at all times - I am not looking forward to having to wean him off that in a few months.

Make-shift crib at work

Josiah is still extremely curious and gets easily fixated on certain toys and contraptions.  For example, we found him standing in his crib trying to pick apart the webcam as well as reaching over to his dresser drawer and taking out all the clothes.  While we continue to move things out of his reach, we realize this will just get harder and heard once he starts walking and really getting into things.  Our apartment is still far from child-proof.  We have a lot of "redecorating" to do!

In other milestone news - I celebrated my first mother's day, brought Josiah to work, and spent my first night away from Shaggy & Josiah for work.  This coming month is going to be even more eventful as I prepare to be in California for 5 nights away!  I'm feeling nervous about it, but I'm sure it'll actually be really good to have some time to myself.

First Mother's Day

10 month update

We are onto the double digits! But unfortunately, the poor kiddo has a fever (his first), so he's pretty mellow today.  But he's on the mend and will be back to his goofy self soon enough.

Josiah is now standing up (with support) and cruising along.  He's still tentative about his new skill and seems to carefully measure every move.  Very risk averse, like his mom. But also easily lured by "shiny objects" and encouragement...also like his mom!  I know he'll be walking in no time, but we are in no rush for that. 

Josiah loves to play, especially in his new "octagon" playpen.  He loves to roll around, dump toys out of the bin onto the mat, and shove them in his mouth.  He's happy as can be...until he notices that we are not paying attention to him, and he starts whining.  Around the time that we introduced the playpen, he started hating his jumparoo and semi-hating his exersaucer (he can at least turn around).  Now that he's tasted more freedom, he seems to resist anything to restricts him in one place. 


He's starting to reach for us and seems to recognize the words "umma" and "appa", but not consistently.  He still adores his nanny, Maria, and loves their daily walks outside and trips to the swing set.  He really likes bathtime, but is harder to manage now that he can't stop moving and trying to touch the bathtub fixtures and toys.  He's not as confident in the swimming pool, though, probably due to the colder temperature.  We took him to an indoor pool this month and he was so stiff and subdued.  We're going to keep trying this summer!

Josiah also cut a bunch of teeth this month, so I think he may be up to 5 (3 on top, 2 on bottom).  That has meant a number of terrible nights...but also lots of toothy, scrunchy-faced grins.  He smiles and laughs at lots of things, including pictures and videos of himself.  He's still obsessed with our phones and is instantly calmed when in sight.  He still really likes his paci too and now likes to put it in his mouth himself, but not always the right way.

Feeding is going ok.  We're on to a 4 bottle (~20-24 oz) per day routine, with 2-3 puree meals in between.  We're starting to dabble in puffs, cheese, and table foods, but he's slow to catch on.  He's still working on his pincer grip and chewing motion.  I usually find his chewed up bits on the floor.  Milk is still tough - he pushes away the bottle and needs to be constantly coaxed.  One day I was so excited to get 6 oz done in a short period of time...only to be rewarded with major throw-up.  You can't win!

On a personal note, April 28th marked my last day of nursing/pumping.  It was a hard decision to make, but it came to a point where the costs (my physical and mental well-being) outweighed the benefits.  Sometimes I get sad for stopping, but for the most part it feels liberating and timely now that I'm going to start traveling for work again.  Josiah doesn't seem to mind the transition to formula...and in fact, has been drinking better now than before.  And honestly, the two immediate perks to this - 1) no more lugging my huge bag to/from work, and 2) finally getting to sleep in every now and then.  I'm slowly chipping away at the sleep deficit I've accumulated over the months.

May is going to be a busy, busy month!!!

9 month update

Josiah is 9 months old today.  He's officially been out in this world as long as he was once in my belly (I still can't believe he came from there)!  These days, he's a little man with a mission - constantly moving around, exploring and finding delight in new things.  I love seeing his proud face when he does something for the first time.  This has been a really fun stage, seeing more of his playful personality emerge, and receiving more affection from him. 

He's generally a happy, cheeky boy, except when he's drinking milk.  We have to force him to drink, and it nearly takes an hour to get him through 4-5 ounces, with lots of screaming and resistance.  I think it may be due to gas or teething or perhaps the type of bottle we're using, but we've struggled with this for a while now.  Sometimes the only thing that works is letting him watch YouTube.  I'm not proud of it...but "Elmo's Song"  and "Hot Diggity Dog" work wonders!

Hopefully we'll figure out this feeding thing soon.  Thankfully, he's eating his purees fine, so at least he's getting his fill there.  He's not quite into finger foods yet, but I'm going to keep trying.  He's still chubby, but he's starting to get leaner everyday.  *Sniff* I'm going to miss his Michelin Man arms and cankles when they're gone!

Crawling and propping himself up

Some highlights from the month:

• Josiah is crawling now!  After several failed attempts at motivating him to move, it took a plastic water bottle to finally lure him.  Now that he's enjoying his new mobility, we really need to look into baby-proofing our home!  I can't imagine how things will be once he walks! 

•  Josiah got his first "real" haircut (not counting the time that Shaggy haphazardly cut a chunk of his hair off)!  I actually wanted to hold off on cutting his hair for awhile, but a few people confused him for a girl when we were on vacation, so I caved in.  It's sort of a "Dumb and Dumber" bowl-cut look, but I still love it!

• Josiah was baptized by his Grandma at her church (Stratford UMC), on Palm Sunday.  It was a joyful occasion, especially being joined by family and friends at both the service and party afterwards.  Josiah was also dedicated at our home church (Morningside UMC) on Easter Sunday, which meant a lot to us to have our church praying for his spiritual welfare.  Josiah did well at both services, and in fact, seemed to like all the attention he received!

 

Baptism